Opening Crawls (Quick Commentary)

The opening crawls.  A throw-back narrative technique to set the tone of a story and to allow the action to begin from the first frame.  It should be a bold call to action but still be a slow ascent to build the tension in preparation for a wild ride, just like the slow climb pulled by the chain at a rickety wooden roller-coaster with the riders locked in and quivering with anticipation.

I'll explain my reasons below, but here is what the opening crawl to Star Wars: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace should have been.  It is an alternative that could have set the tone right for the opening episode of a saga that would follow generations of heroes and villains and their impact on a bright, exciting open Galaxy:

STAR WARS

Episode I

THE PHANTOM MENACE

It is a period of fragile peace.

The dreaded Sith Empire has lay dormant

for over a thousand years,

since they were vanquished

by the brave and wise JEDI KNIGHTS,

defenders of  the Light,

and champions of The Old Republic.

But corruption grows within the Galactic Senate

and the Republic's influence

is spread thin in the outlying regions,

now fertile ground for darkness to foment. 

Unleashing his sinister agents, Darth Sidious,

DARK LORD OF THE SITH, orchestrates from the shadows, the vessel for ancient plans

that can consolidate his power

and restore the might and glory of the ruthless Sith Empire

on an unsuspecting galaxy...

But that is NOT what we read on May 19, 1999 when theatres around the world went dark and a new chapter of the Star Wars galaxy was born.

Don't get me wrong.  There were many things done well in 1999 with Star Wars: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace.  The teaser trailer STILL gives me chills.  Seriously...I just watched it again and it captured all of the mystery, excitement, pathos and history that the sage deserved.  If you don't remember how good it was, just click here:   I dare you not to get goose bumps.

And the second trailer just continued to get better...

After waiting in line for hours, the movie sold out at the Uptown Theatre in Washington, DC within about 45 minutes.  We all have our own thoughts on what could or should have been different, and what they did right.  I actually thought that Qui Gonn using the lightsaber in the beginning to burn a molten hole in the control room door was a palpable, visceral image that showed the full power of a creative, improvisational Jedi in full harmony with his powers and his determination to not be stopped by any obstacle.

To see Jedi venturing out into the universe, just doing their job...protecting the innocent while being guided by the Force was delightful.

But looking back to 1999, from the very iconic opening crawl gave us pause.  There was no grandeur, no zing.  This was not the opening to a story with the DNA of Flash Gordon or Buck Rodgers.  This set the tone for an opening of a dry History Channel or PBS documentary.  And while, the History Channel can do wonderful things...setting up a roller-coaster Saturday Morning serial adventure is not one of them.

The danger signs for what we would discover was an overall cluttered mess were there from the moment the lights dimmed and the curtain opened.  There was just something wrong with the opening crawl.

Here is what actually said:

STAR WARS

EPISODE I

THE PHANTOM MENACE

Turmoil has engulfed the

Galactic Republic. The taxation

of trade routes to outlying star

systems is in dispute.

Hoping to resolve the matter

with a blockade of deadly

battleships, the greedy Trade

Federation has stopped all

shipping to the small planet

of Naboo.

While the congress of the

Republic endlessly debates

this alarming chain of events,

the Supreme Chancellor has

secretly dispatched two Jedi

Knights, the guardians of

peace and justice in the

galaxy, to settle the conflict...

Huh?  A dispute over taxation?  Endless congressional debates? How do these elevate to a Galaxy engulfed in Turmoil!!!!?  We, as an audience, already knew the battles between the Rebels and the Empire.  But in order to move the story forward, to an epic climax, the camera needed to be pulled back to the larger themes.  We wanted good versus evil.  We wanted an escalation of the scope of the stories.  We did not want a treatise on fiscal policy.

Sure, once the story started, there would have been nothing wrong with using the machinations of the Senate and the Trade Federation as the kernel of the conflict.   Elements of diplomacy, trade and politics are weaved through all three original films.  Leia's diplomatic mission to Alderaan.  Han's smuggling ways and the underground culture left to thrive with a Galaxy under the thumb of tyrannical oppression.  Lando's city in the clouds staying beneath radar of outside influence forced to betray his oldest friend.  The original trilogy did not shy away from what could have been dry or convoluted, but the details were used to create a realistic setting where the actions of the characters were influenced by the events and times they lived in, while just as much influencing those very events and times.

But by starting with such a narrow, dry conflict, it was unclear from the start what the stakes were and why we should care.

All of this, with the style and tone of 1977 original crawl from a film then just called STAR WARS was used for me to create the opening crawl that began this piece.  But to remember where it all started and how, here is how it all began:

STAR WARS

 EPISODE IV

 A NEW HOPE

It is a period of civil war. Rebel

spaceships, striking from a hidden

base, have won their first victory

against the evil Galactic Empire.

 During the battle, Rebel spies managed

to steal secret plans to the Empire's

ultimate weapon, the Death Star, an

armored space station with enough

power to destroy an entire planet.

 Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents,

Princess Leia races home aboard her

starship, custodian of the stolen plans

that can save her people and restore

freedom to the galaxy...