I really enjoyed Rogue One, but I would have preferred if after Jyn got the plans from the Vault, she and the rest of her band of Rebels had met at a rendezvous and together blasted across the beach to the transmission tower topped with Krennic's office, with Rogue One providing air support clearing the way. Jyn and Cassian enter the tower blasting their way to Krennic's office complex in the tower.
Bodhi holds his position in the air for as long as he can taking out as many AT-ATs and AT-STs as he can, but eventually there are just too many TIES and he's shot down. Baze and Chirrut lead the force outside securing the building. Their heroics hold the building long enough for the transmission to be sent. They hold the line until Vader pushes in with the imperial forces into the tower killing them and tearing through the hallway to the control room.
Interspersed with this final barricaded defense, the confrontation between Orson Krennic and Jyn Galen should have drawn more from the themes and connections from earlier in the film and in Catalyst. Also, I thought that it should have ripples that tie it to The Force Awakens and beyond.
Here's what I came up with:
************************************
<Jyn starts upload of Death Star plans.>
<Krennic appears with gun raised. Since he still doesn't know of the flaw, he doesn't bother to shoot. He just wants to capture her.>
Krennic: You've lost. Your little offensive was for nothing. The lives of your friends down there on the beachfront...wasted. All this to get a glimpse at the plans for your own destruction? What could you have possibly hoped to have achieved here?
Jyn: We learned precisely what we needed to learn. We learned your greatest weakness...arrogance. You've gotten so caught up in your own lies and propaganda that it doesn't even occur to you that your technological wonder is as rotten and fragile at the core as your precious Empire. We learned the secret of exactly how my father won his struggle with you for all those years.
Krennic: What did you say? Your father? Your...father. That necklace. I know that necklace. Lyra. Galen. You must be Jyn. By the stars...Galen...what have you done?
Jyn: He spent a lifetime protecting me. Sabotaging your endeavor from the start. Your prize will rot from the inside out.
Krennic: IMPOSSIBLE! WHAT HAS HE DONE, CHILD?!?! WHAT HAS HE DONE?!?!
<He notices the upload and runs over to the controls. He drops his weapon as he starts frantically entering codes to cancel the transmission>.
<Jyn moves forward towards him with her pistol aimed at him. She kicks his gun away. He is so frantic that he doesn't even notice.>
Krennic: I'm locked out of my own system. What have you done?
Jyn: Once these plans finish transmitting, the Galaxy will know precisely how to destroy your battle station. My father built its own destruction into the very heart of the Death Star. Your Empire is finished.
Krennic: No, this can't be. Without the power your father and I have unleashed...you'll condemn the Galaxy to endless war. The chaos will consume your children and your children's children. My Death Star is a gift to the Galaxy. It is the only hope we have for peace. Lasting peace.
Jyn: Peace without freedom is slavery. It's an illusion. Your Galaxy would only have room for the freedom of one man...Palpatine. It would not be for you or me or anyone else. My mother always told me that in The Force, we're all connected. I finally understand what she meant. All of us...you and I...we are one with The Force, and The Force is one with us. All your Death Star will do will fracture us. Inside us all are Kybur crystals...you just have to feel that the Force of Others is with you...always.
Here's what I came up with:
************************************
<Jyn starts upload of Death Star plans.>
<Krennic appears with gun raised. Since he still doesn't know of the flaw, he doesn't bother to shoot. He just wants to capture her.>
Krennic: You've lost. Your little offensive was for nothing. The lives of your friends down there on the beachfront...wasted. All this to get a glimpse at the plans for your own destruction? What could you have possibly hoped to have achieved here?
Jyn: We learned precisely what we needed to learn. We learned your greatest weakness...arrogance. You've gotten so caught up in your own lies and propaganda that it doesn't even occur to you that your technological wonder is as rotten and fragile at the core as your precious Empire. We learned the secret of exactly how my father won his struggle with you for all those years.
Krennic: What did you say? Your father? Your...father. That necklace. I know that necklace. Lyra. Galen. You must be Jyn. By the stars...Galen...what have you done?
Jyn: He spent a lifetime protecting me. Sabotaging your endeavor from the start. Your prize will rot from the inside out.
Krennic: IMPOSSIBLE! WHAT HAS HE DONE, CHILD?!?! WHAT HAS HE DONE?!?!
<He notices the upload and runs over to the controls. He drops his weapon as he starts frantically entering codes to cancel the transmission>.
<Jyn moves forward towards him with her pistol aimed at him. She kicks his gun away. He is so frantic that he doesn't even notice.>
Krennic: I'm locked out of my own system. What have you done?
Jyn: Once these plans finish transmitting, the Galaxy will know precisely how to destroy your battle station. My father built its own destruction into the very heart of the Death Star. Your Empire is finished.
Krennic: No, this can't be. Without the power your father and I have unleashed...you'll condemn the Galaxy to endless war. The chaos will consume your children and your children's children. My Death Star is a gift to the Galaxy. It is the only hope we have for peace. Lasting peace.
Jyn: Peace without freedom is slavery. It's an illusion. Your Galaxy would only have room for the freedom of one man...Palpatine. It would not be for you or me or anyone else. My mother always told me that in The Force, we're all connected. I finally understand what she meant. All of us...you and I...we are one with The Force, and The Force is one with us. All your Death Star will do will fracture us. Inside us all are Kybur crystals...you just have to feel that the Force of Others is with you...always.
Krennic: You are a naive fool...just like your parents.
Jyn: That is the kindest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Krennic: Please...I'm begging you. Do not do this. If my Death Star is destroyed before order is restored...then my entire life will have been wasted.
Jyn: My parents lost a lifetime they should have spent together. I lost a lifetime I could have...should have spent with my parents. Those years were wasted. All because of you and your Empire.
Krennic: If you send those plans...you'll never get off this planet alive. And even if you do...the Empire will never stop hunting you.
Jyn: I've been running my whole life. If my destiny is to free the Galaxy from your tyranny, then that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
<Upload plans is complete.>
Krennic: You've murdered us all.
Jyn: History will decide. I put my trust in The Force. I put my trust in each other.
Krennic: I will stop you, if it is the last thing I do.
Jyn: I'm very sorry to hear that. I take no pleasure in what I am about to do.
Krennic: You can kill me, but the people of the Galaxy are weak. They crave Order. It is inevitable. It can not be stopped. Your victory will be a blip.
Jyn: You have to start somewhere.
<Krennic's eyes widen as he remembers his own words from so long ago. She fires and he drops to the floor. Even now, Jyn sees the Death Star filling the sky.>
<Jyn rushes to Cassian and helps him to his feet. He puts his arm around her neck for support and they make their way to the exit, but it opens and out of the smoke Lord Vaders enters.
Jyn: That is the kindest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Krennic: Please...I'm begging you. Do not do this. If my Death Star is destroyed before order is restored...then my entire life will have been wasted.
Jyn: My parents lost a lifetime they should have spent together. I lost a lifetime I could have...should have spent with my parents. Those years were wasted. All because of you and your Empire.
Krennic: If you send those plans...you'll never get off this planet alive. And even if you do...the Empire will never stop hunting you.
Jyn: I've been running my whole life. If my destiny is to free the Galaxy from your tyranny, then that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
<Upload plans is complete.>
Krennic: You've murdered us all.
Jyn: History will decide. I put my trust in The Force. I put my trust in each other.
Krennic: I will stop you, if it is the last thing I do.
Jyn: I'm very sorry to hear that. I take no pleasure in what I am about to do.
Krennic: You can kill me, but the people of the Galaxy are weak. They crave Order. It is inevitable. It can not be stopped. Your victory will be a blip.
Jyn: You have to start somewhere.
<Krennic's eyes widen as he remembers his own words from so long ago. She fires and he drops to the floor. Even now, Jyn sees the Death Star filling the sky.>
<Jyn rushes to Cassian and helps him to his feet. He puts his arm around her neck for support and they make their way to the exit, but it opens and out of the smoke Lord Vaders enters.
He steps over Krennick and with a wave of his hand, lifts Jyn and Cassian into the air, and without a word, breaks their necks.
Thinking his mission a success with all of the Rebels killed, he walks to the computer to turn off the blaring alarm. The alarms quiet and as Vader begins to leave, he hears a beeping that draws him to a console with a green blinking light. It states, "TRANSMISSION TO COORDINATES 11381977 COMPLETE. UPLOAD SUCCESSFUL."
Vader enters a few commands into the control console and presses a button opening a comm channel to his Star Destroyer. We see Vader from behind as hear him say, "Commander, I have just sent a data file with the coordinates of a transmission. Set a course to intercept and prepare for the jump to light speed as soon as I arrive." "Yes, Lord Vader, as you wish." Vader turns, facing the audience and walks toward the exit filling the screen.
The next scene is the Tantive IV...and hope.
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